May 19, 2017, 5:19 PM
There's a popular metaphor that likens the ending of stages in our lives to the ending of chapters in a book. In thinking so much about the closing of this chapter in my life, I've come to find myself mentally picking apart the metaphor for a deeper meaning.
To many, the end of a book or chapter should provide closure. That would only be polite and right... right? There's something comforting about receiving a deserved conclusion of sorts. However, I realize the naivety of the aforementioned as I grow and move painfully closer to the period that closes out this waning last sentence in this unforgettable chapter of my life. With that, I come to realize that closure at the end of a chapter is no guarantee. Often, it can be an unrealistic and optimistic expectation.
Next, this thought process brings me to examining the blank page often placed between chapters in a book. I've never given the symbolism of those blank pages a second thought, nor have I before considered them a strategic tool, but in this moment, it feels all too relevant to the way I'm feeling. A chapter without closure in the end makes for a period of severe uncertainty. A cliffhanger vibe because the last chapter feels as if it was cut short, while the next chapter has yet to begin.
That's the blank page. That period of time spent wondering what the hell kind of ending that was and brainstorming all possibilities for what the oncoming chapter could entail. That period of time spent lost, searching for your direction, as you watch others hit the first sentence of their next chapter running, while others cling nostalgically to the vanishing chapter they don't truly wish to leave.
Despite feeling like a deer in the headlights, I still like the book that is my life far more than any I have ever read. I suppose that's how I feel because despite not really having a clue, I know that the chapter that lies before me isn't one that is predetermined and previously authored. The chapter is eerily blank and unreservedly mine to write. Here's to the next chapter.